Over the weekend my ex and I drunk texted quite a bit… Or should I say drunk sexted cause since when have I ever held back on this blog? It was really fun and scandalous at first, but by the end of the weekend I was all set. Over it. No desire. In other words… Set free I guess?
So, like I said we sexted over the weekend. Let me rewind to how this started. I accidentally followed him on instagram and didn’t realize it… Awkward. While I was at work I checked my phone which had a notification from IG saying.. (Lets name him Devil Man) Devil man just accepted my follow request! My. Heart. Sank. It was a really shitty night at work and the last thing I wanted was to see devil mans name on my phone! So in the heat of the moment I messaged him I felt so awkward. I basically said hey I didnt mean to request you that was awkward and weird my bad… And I ended it saying BEST REGARDS. Who am I some 90-year-old women from out the mid centuries?! So, no response from him. Alright even more awkward. After work I get a drink with some co-workers and decide we should totally hook up. It seems like a great idea in my head. So I message him again and this is where the sexting/juicy stuff comes into play.
Were chatting its fun and like a dirty little secret im all about it. Than devil man tells me hes dating this girl long distance and shell be moving to the area soon. Fuck. Im a bad person Im over here trying to have a one night stand with my ex who’s onto his next! We joke about being bad people and continue with the fun dirty little secret talk- again still fun. The next morning I get up early to get my hair CHOPPED off. Low and behold there’s a message waiting for me just saying “bad” well, no shit. So we talk about how its bad and we cant do it but it’d be a blast but it’s very bad. Whatever. Than he says “it isn’t like a don’t love her” PAUSE- WHAT- LOVE?! HE LOVES HER?!
I’m not gonna lie that sorta fucked me up for like twenties minutes… But like I said at the beginging I was getting my hair cut this was my self-love morning and I wasnt going to let him ruin it or dwell. Which takes me to the title of this post “set free” Im not hurt about him or anyone anymore I don’t feel less to anyone or rejected. Im happy devil man found love he’s a great guy and deserves to have someone he loves around. I’m happy learning to love myself and wouldn’t have my life any other way right now.